My housemate and I talk about this all the time, we have had lengthy, frustrated discussions, all revolving around our coupled friends inability to see that you can be happy and single at the same time. Shock horror!
It’s like as soon as you hit your mid 20’s and your not in a relationship people begin to assume there is something wrong with you. They begin to think that it is ok to try and set you up with anyone they know who is single, they think its ok to comment and pass judgment.
I don’t remember the last time I asked a married couple how marriage was working out for them, have they been on any good dates lately or had any good sex? But if you’re single it seems fair game.
I have found it more often than not happens with those I see less often, perhaps those friends I see once a month. You catch up after your general hello’s and how are you’s its right on to, ‘So are you seeing anyone?’
Um well actually I am not seeing anyone and contrary what you probably think, I am not spending my Saturday nights sobbing in to my pillow. Nor am I lonely, I am out enjoying my life and spending time with fun people who are also enjoying theirs.
I am single because I choose to be, I have no time just to have a partner because it’s the done thing. Until I meet someone who actually makes me want to share my time with them I am just not that interested.
Nor am I at all scared and sad that I am going to end up alone, I have friends, they are great and I don’t have to worry about the shit that comes with relationships with them!
I know particularly for my housemate, that most of her friends are married and for some reason they think she must be miserable because she isn’t. But since when did a relationship status become directly to linked with happiness levels or life satisfaction in general?
There is so much more to life and happiness than being in a relationship, I mean sure they can be great, but its not all doom and gloom if you are happily flying solo. I also have far more interesting things to talk about than awkward dates I have been on and boys I am not that interested in.
So we will happily continue to fly solo, being selfish and spending time with people that add value to our lives. Maybe going on awkward dates, maybe not. Either way I am happy, others might not understand but I’m working on not caring.